A comedian who used missing girl Cédrika Provencher as the punchline in a joke about ruthless tax collectors says he’s terrified to leave his home after getting death threats over the routine.

Mike Ward, a well-known Quebec stand-up comedian, says he’s getting angry looks and snide comments every time he goes out. “I haven’t been able to leave the house since Friday,” Mr. Ward says in a video message posted on his website.

“Everywhere I go, I get stared at. I get judged. Christ, there are two imbeciles on my street who have been in front of my house since Friday.”

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While the subject is extremely touchy, some of Cédrika’s family and other supporters say the gag is no cause for threats.

“I’d say it’s no time to make jokes on the topic of Cédrika, but it wasn’t really cruel and wasn’t aimed at her,” said the girl’s grandfather, Henri Provencher.

“I know it’s the comedian’s role to test the limits of taste, but we’ve still got an open wound, and this certainly picks at it. But it’s also not the time to react by going overboard.”

It always cracks me up when people threaten violence on someone for being insensitive because only the truly empathic want to kick the crap out of someone for things said.

I got a taste of it, I have  a new bit that as it builds it slowly sucks the air out of the room, the tension peaks (essentially the crowd thinks I’m about to reveal myself as a racist) and the audience is silently bemused until I drop the punchline, snapping the tension in a way that is just a helluva buzz. Like Indian Jones whipping a luger out of a Nazi’s hand.

I did my very first official opening spot at The Prescott and it went really well, looking forward to tonight where I’m going to try the above bit out.

I didn’t do it last night because it was a small crowd and the MC asked if there were any Knight Rider jokes so I couldn’t resist resurrecting a slightly older bit that referenced the classic show so it fit. I was also proud that I was able to change my set up on the fly like that.

is to punch out a drunken Andy Dick.

Too much comedy going on in this city, it’s like the 80s only without the coke.

Anyone thinks of wearing suspenders and I will burn Ottawa to the ground, I will not put up with that shit again.

MC Herb Irving

Is almost a caricature of a comedian, that is he’s deeply generic from material to delivery, I saw nothing new thus nothing particularly interesting. His first big laugh came from a bit pointing out that the audience wasn’t laughing that much.

Alex Wood

Got two applause breaks in his first minute on stage so there you go. It should be noted that Alex is a scum-sucking weasel cum-dumpster diver for not only getting free passes to the new Batman movie but the chance to do a set before the movie. How many comedians get to open for the Dark Knight? How many dream of such a thing? Well just me and that’s why Alex is a jerk.

Eric Russo

Continues to do his best Dane Cook and the best Dane Cook is no Dane cook.

Dom Pare

Jebus that guy again? From now on unless he Bomb Pare’s it I’m not going to say anymore about him.

Carrie Gaetz

Is off the Just For Laughs to do a life changing six minutes but no pressure! Actually there isn’t Carrie killed last night, she’ll kill in Montreal, the end.

Two funny Carrie moments:

Coming off stage Jason tells her she went fifteen seconds over six minutes, “but don’t worry,” Jason said helpfully, “Forty five seconds of that was laughs, you won’t get that in Montreal.” Thanks coach, Jason then went on and asked the cancer kid in the wheel chair why he spends so much money on running shoes.

The second when she gave me her new spiffy business card, out of tradition and habit I started to put it into my wallet… “Oh!” she said without a trace of deliberate irony “You can’t keep it, I only have seven.” And to make it clear she wasn’t joking she gingerly took it back, smoothing out one of the edges. I can’t wait till she scribbling her number on the back of a cocktail napkin for a bemused Lorne Michaels because the Keith’s rep got her last one.

HL Doug Funk

Never got the chance to see Doug until last night, only heard good things and those things were accurate. He is excellent. Solid, clean, universal material, precise and engaging delivery, superb Brian Regan quality miming and a stripper pole bit that cause me to near choke on my beer. I loved his set right up until the end; his closing bit was a glaring disappointment. It starts off cute; when you say “can’t” with a Scottish brogue it sounds like “cunt”. It’s executed flawlessly, the accent is perfect and the puppet show delivery a creative twist but what should be a quick one shot is milked and milked and milked and then the cow dies, a witch doctor is brought in then the cow is resurrected for one more giant teat squeeze. It was like the cherry on the sundae I was enjoying was replaced with an olive pit.

Here.

Here.

Zach is currently one of my favorite comedians that only comedians know about, he walks such a fine line between prepared material and off the cuff vicious insanity, he’s the reason why the edge bleeds.

Baby launching

Anal beer puns

Mankinis

Darryl Pervis – MC

Good stuff, the crowd warmed to his self-deprecating loser shtick pretty quickly, some quick and sharp spritzing got the audience firing on all cylinders; it would take a pretty talentless hack to fail with a room that well prepped.

Oliver Gross

And I was just the talentless hack to do it! They hated me like I was trying to sell them land in Florida, I did manage to dig myself out of one hole only to fall into another. My biggest laugh came from a throwaway bit about the vomit and Canadian flags littering the Market after Canada Day. Easily my worst AC set ever.

Paul Balyot

New guy from Montreal (at least to me) an excellent stage presence and charisma, some chraming stuff about being a Canadian Pilipino with a Jewish boss. My enjoyment of his set collapsed when he started doing jokes I know I’ve heard before. Like “Jew” vs. “Jewish” (Jon Stewart has a few bits that beat that horse dead) and worse, the naked men in the gym bit (Tim Allen’s book “Don’t Stand Too Close to a Naked Man”) complete using the mic as a swinging dick then dragging it on the floor to represent the black guy. The audience ate it right up of course, applause breaks a plenty but still he needs to get some fresh material, he’s got the stage chops, half the war has been won.

Brent Cassidy

While he did better than I did the stool and mic stand could make the same claim, less shocking and more wit is what I think his act need. They were an oooey crowd but it seemed that the majority of big reactions came in the form of “OOooohhhh” rather than laughs.

Two Loons

I’ve managed to miss their sets every time I’ve been on a show with them, I had a sneaking suspicion that I knew what it was anyway; ballad style songs counter-pointing raunchy lyrics and I was right. They were surprisingly unpolished at times is about the worst I can say but the best I can say is that they didn’t suck. It’s just that the “Flight of the Conchords” has pretty much laid waist to the genre, you can’t do anything without being compared to or even accused of being them. They may want to try for something different; Bruce Mccullough’s “Shame Based Man” or “Radio Free Vestibule” are examples of pushing musical comedy into new directions.

Melissa Morse

A fantastic set, applause breaks on pretty much every bit, even the weird crazy shit that flew over the audience’s head like a unicorn shitting rainbow elves got laughs. They may not have known why they were laughing but on some level they knew it was funny. Melissa has always been good but that set was easily the best.

Alex Wood

Just destroyed the place so nothing new, for the last three weeks his sets have been on a steady rising arc. While there wasn’t anything new he’s added new tags and expanded on various established bits. Google v. God most notably where he’s added a colour commentary (don’t worry God fans, he’s catching up!)

Carrie Gaetz

Asked Jeff if she could do a “tight three minutes”. Jeff replied “Oh yeah, you’re well know for going under you time.” Let’s face it, she would have spent three minutes telling the crowd she only had three minutes. The only thing Carrie can do in three minutes is a pitcher.

Jay Malone – Headliner

Because I’m a loser with a day job I couldn’t stick around to watch his set so I will assume he did well, gonna try and catch him on the weekend.

Sugar Sammy (India/Canada) who has been voted the number one stand-up comedian for the last three years in Canada

Um… I don’t remember that election….

In his hometown of Montreal, Sugar Sammy has been voted the number one stand-up for the last three years by the readers of The Montreal Mirror, Montreal’s Premier Arts, and Entertainment Weekly.

Ah.